Da' Dream Makin' Cold Blooded Sausage


Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Bobo's New Offensive Scheme and As Promised the Revised List of Richt Replacement Candidates

Well The old Rider took a few days off from fighting the never ending war against Richt-O-Phillia but now in the immortal words of South Carolina all-time great Corey Boyd "I'm back like cooked crack, son." I trust that in my absence Mr. Sanchez and Samdizl took good care you the Neanderthal fan-base of the most despised outlaw site in all of Georgia Bulldog bloggery.

Just prior to my vacation I promised a revised list of candidates to replace Mark Richt and per request of some of our more devoted readers we will give a list of serious candidates. However, that is later in this post. I would like to start out talking about the newest trend in Richt-O-Philliedom. Up until now most Richt-O-Philles were clinging to the idea that we would find the second coming of Mt. Cody at a juco school to come in and fix all of our defensive problems. Also, these prospective buyers of ocean front property in Nebraska have bought into the idea of Richt pulling in a Georgia High School Dream team. As the wheels slowly start to fall off the recruiting band wagon Richt-O-Philles the state over have a new glimmer of hope on which to cling, an offensive scheme or alignment that will make better use of Murray.

We are going to call this the Unicorn Formation because if you think this is going to happen (or work if it does) you probably spent most of the 7th-12th grades drawing pictures of unicorns on all of your notebooks.

As we all sit around with baited breath to see what new and innovative attack Brother Bobo comes up with here is the S&G proposal. You put the long snap center on the field- line Murray up 15 yards deep- and stagger nine receivers. It will work because one O-lineman is just a likely to block as well as five did in 2010. Since we basically had no running game why bother with a back. Nine receivers is a bit problematic because what are you going to do put nine corners on the field? Do you see the genius of it all? Sure five or six guys will come unabated to the QB but that is why he lines up so deep, plus we can take advantage of his ability to scramble. Now I know what your saying "Rider why line up two receivers staggered behind the others?" SCREEN PASSES,SON! You know Brother Bobo aint going to give up on his bread and butter. Bout to get that Unicorn all up in them guts, baby!

Now once the recruiting and the Unicorn formation fails it will be time for us to look at a new Head Coach. There are basically three schools of thought on this:
1. Go after a HC of a smaller or poorer school
2. Go after an innovative offensive coordinator, or
3. Go after a hard-nosed defensive coordinator with some past success.
Let's start with a couple of disclaimers:
1. Kirby Smart and Gus Malzahn are probably the early front runners so we won't mention them.
2. Ralph Friedgent and George O'Leary are 100% not candidates
3. Jon Gruden and Bill Cowhler are NFL guys and will not consider college plus they have no real college experience
4. I am not here to pass judgement one way or the other and I do not want to open the comments up to a race discussion. However, we aim to keep it really real all the time. With that in mind you know as well as I do that the powers that be at Georgia will not hire a black HC so take Kevin Sumlin and Charlie Strong off the board of prospective candidates.
Now last time we went with the OC of a successful program although we failed to see that he was just a cog in a greater machine of dominance. So as far as coordinators go we would like to see that they have experience and if possible have gotten results in more than one place and/or had a hand in building a program up that started off as nothing. Lets start with offensive coordinators in no particular order.

1. Dana Holgorsen- OC/HC in waiting West Virginia Pros- Innovator that has had success at Texas Tech, Houston, and Oklahoma State. Looks like a dude that lives at Myrtle Beach, takes his meals at one of the many fine titty bar/buffet establishments, and rocks out to Jimmy Buffett on the Reginald. I know what your asking "Rider--Texas Tech, offensive genius, drawn to the ocean, lover of titties- do I sense a Mike Leach tie?" Ah you do indeed sir Dana cut his teeth at the knee of the Master himself while at Texas Tech.

Cons- It may be a timing issue with Dana because he has been named the OC at West Virginia for the upcoming season and will then become the HC in 2012. However, we are talking West Virginia and no one really wants to live there not even alumni (see Rich Rod). So Dana may see WV as a stepping stone to something bigger like say the SEC. It would probably cost a good bit to pull him away as well. No real SEC ties.

2. Bryan Harsin- OC Texas Pros- A great deal of success at Boise State and we shall see after this season if his system translates to a conference that plays big boy football every week. Energetic and young so that should translate well into the recruiting field
Cons- No SEC ties. So young that the youth may work against him in some regards. If you are like me then you don't believe in Boise State and are still shell shocked from the Hawkins fiasco at Colorado.

3. Paul Chryst- OC Wisconsin

Pros- We know that if nothing else we will run the football and have a well coached O-line. The transition into his offense would be almost seamless as he runs a pro style, run heavy, play action attack. He looks like he could head-butt a man to death in a street fight seriously his head is bigger that Lester the Hat Molester. His success has come despite Wisconsin's athletes being whiter than the local Klan rally.

Cons- Despite being well coached his offense has up until this year been a victim of the Tressel mind control. However, he may have broken through after the Badgers thumped the chocolate peanut butter balls this year. No real ties to the SEC

Defensive Coordinators

1. Bud Foster- DC Virginia Tech Pros- Would bring a tough, scrappy, bring your lunch pail mentality to a team that has too often looked way too soft. Defensive genius that is never out coached but can at times be over whelmed by superior talent. Has a knack for fixing problems during the season and during games. Deep ties to southern recruiting
Cons- Some think he just happy to be a DC. He did flirt with the Clempsun job but then realized "Oh my God I am flirting with Clempsun" and got the hell out of that deal. While defense wins championships we would still need to see a solid plan for how he would go about the offensive side of the ball.

2. Mark Banker- DC Oregon State
Pros- Habitually makes a substance that can pass for chicken salad despite only having chicken s*#t to work with at Oregon State. Very experienced. Has coached at the NFL level as well as big time college ball at USC. If given a far superior pool of talent at Georgia he could do an excellent job of coaching them up.
Cons- No real ties to the South or the SEC and has not exactly set the recruiting world on fire. Would probably be at best a seventh or eighth choice and hiring him may send a red flag around the conference that UGA has slipped further than most people believe.
Head Coaches

1. Gary Patterson- Head Coach TCU
Pros- What more lavish praise can we heap upon coach Patterson. He is our favorite and were we in charge would have been offered the job after the Colorado debacle.
1. Is he a yeller? Check
2. Is he a sweater? Check
3. Is he portly? Check and Check Mate.
Nothing is awesomer that a fat sweaty dude that yells at everything all the time. Wildly successful at a very small school that was essentially nothing when he got there. Could possibly bring an excellent staff with him especially a defensive staff. He is too awesome to fail!
Cons- No real SEC ties although after he yells at a recruit once the recruit will forever be in love with the man. At TCU he is now making $3 million a year and is moving into the worst of the BCS conferences which means he would be leaving a yearly trip to a BCS game and a shot at the National Title every few years to rebuild a team in the deepest conference in the Nation. It would cost a ton of money to get him at this point.

t2. Mike Riley- Head Coach Oregon State
t2. Sonny Dykes- Head Coach Louisianna Tech
Pros- Both are well experienced and both get a pretty good effort out of players that couldn't make back-up special teams in the SEC. Both are very safe picks. Riley has Dykes on the experience side of things but Dykes has stronger ties to the South and got a good deal of training from Dr. Leach formerly of the Texas Concussion Relief Foundation.
Cons- Much like with Banker they could be seen as desperation moves because the University had been turned down by a number of previous candidates. Also, you are banking on them being able to do more than they have ever done in the past just based on the increased talent they should have at their disposal while at Georgia.
3. The Dread Pirate Leach- HC of our hearts
Pros- Do you like Awesomeness? Do you like to score a ton of points? Do you appreciate the ramblings of an insane man at pressers?
Cons- You would have to make a bold move and pay someone like Bud Foster $2.5 million a year to coach the defense. The University administration is way too weak to even consider this much awesomenss.


  1. I still say that if 2011 is a failure, I vote for The Pirate! If nothing else, it would be fun as hell to watch for a few years!

  2. If you can find me 1 coach that will take the job, who has won more than 96 games in the last 10 seasons in college, I'd be interested. Last time I checked, there's only 4 out of 120 that have done that.

  3. Mark Richt is in the top 5 for wins for his first 5 seasons, and top 20 for wins over the last 5 seasons. Very few guys can beat that in the SEC, very, very few

  4. Bobo's offensive scheming just laid down 30 points a game, 7 games in a row. Bobo just came up @40 points shy of setting the all-time record for offensive scoring in Georgia history.

  5. Anon @1:12 and 1:14

    I can name you a coach in the SEC that is 2-8 against Florida, has two loses to Kentucky and one to Vanderbilt. I can name you a coach in the SEC that got beaten by Colorado the worst BCS conference school in the county over the past decade. I can name you the first Georiga coach since 1974 to get beaten by Mississippi State. I can name for you an SEC coach that got embarassed in abowl game against a Conf. USA team that has only been around for about 15 years and had never won a prior bowl game.

    -Anon @ 1:18
    How many point did UGA score against Central Florida was it less than 40? How many TDs did UGA score in that game? Bobo had a month to prepare for that game. How about South Carolina how many points there? How about Missy State how many points there? And Colorado how many points? You are talking about the worst Tennessee team in 50 years, Kentucky, Idaho State, and GT. Bobo didn't get 40 against Auburn or Florida otherwise those would have been wins.

  6. Hey CC Rider we gave up 49 to Auburn you dumb homo.

  7. -Anon @3:00

    Oh I'm so sorry I didn't remember the exact number of points we gave up to Auburn to fag-lick.

    Nothing like a jerk-off pro who sits around doing nothing and correcting the mistakes of people doing awesome stuff.

  8. Anon 3:00,
    I thought it was pretty funny. This turd doesn't do research she just puts whatever garbage she wants to put out there. She lives in a dream world. This is a normal CCRider post, she talks out of both sides of her mouth. Genius she is not.

  9. -Anon @7:24

    Are you the English professor we shot down a few months back that was always bitching over spelling. Research what the hell is research?

    Do you Richt-O-Philes understand that your main defense is that Auburn beat us by more points than I originally thought.
    "Un-uh Mark Richt is the best coach and if we had scored 40 on Auburn we still would have lost cause they scored 49."
    Well played sir.

    A couple of points here:
    1. Research on a comment......really you want research on a comment not a post but a comment.
    2. Wicked burn on the referring to me in the female, but using the word turd isn't that a little racey for a Richt-O-Phille.....what would the deacon board think?
    3. Talking out of both sides of my mouth would have me saying Richt should be fired and then saying well maybe not.....I'm 100% for firing Richt.
    4. I love the fact that you Richt-O-Philles laid low for a few weeks after the UCF debacle. I guess y'all are starting to come back out of the wood-work.
    5. Can't wait to see what new cutting edge insults y'all start throwing at us cause the Richt hate will continue to flow on our end.

  10. "Bobo just layed down 30 points a game 7 games in a row"

    Are you even watching the same games the rest of us are ?

    Bobo just LOST SEVEN (7) GAMES, the most in UGA history - last accomplished 53 years ago in 1957.

    # 72 at 1st Downs

    # 56 Total Offense

    # 62 at being sacked

    # 55 at 3rd Down Conversions