Big Twelvine Country is a Sad, Bitter, Cold Place

There are few things in this world to be more greatly pitied than an ugly girl who doesn't know she is ugly. They live their entire lives as a lie. You say to yourself "she has to know how ugly she is, right?" but alas she is truly in denial. Thus is the case with the Big Ten. Like ugly girls that think they are hot the Big Ten has this inflated sense of self-worth that is totally unjustified. The popular sports media also plays a role in this problem as the media itself acts much as the parents of the ugly girl--as enablers. You see ugly chicks are told their entire lives how attractive they are by their parents in an effort to over compensate for the horrendous mixture of genes that created their wolley-booger of a daughter.
However, if you look closely enough you will see that the ugly chick knows, sub-consciously, that she is ugly because she will lash out against attractive girls. Ugly chicks hate hot chicks. They talk crap about them all the time, pick a part their most minor flaws, and call them names like slut, and whore. Therefore you can naturally see the analogy here. The SEC is the hottest chick in town and the dog-faced gremlin that is the Big Ten hates the SEC. The Big Ten is always trying to get all the other average to ugly girls (ACC, Big 12, PAC 10, Big East) to hate the SEC as well. The Big Ten passes notes in study hall about how the SEC "isn't very academically strong, or aren't really research facilities, or don't have high academic standards" blah, blah, blah. "What's that ugly girl you got more questions on your test right than the hot chick? Well that is good because you are going to have to work for everything you ever get for the rest of your life while the hot chick will most likely be given everything she wants by virtue of her hotness."
I love how hope will spring eternal for all the Big Ten and Big East guys over at ESPN for the next few months. They will laud the flaws in the SEC for the next few weeks. They will say how the SEC is weak in terms of Quarterback talent. They will point out how the traditional big three in the SEC East are down. They will nit-pick every aspect of all twelve of the SEC's schools, and they will begin a media blitz designed to convince you that the addition of Nebraska has in some way, shape, of form elevated the Big Ten over the SEC. All the while the SEC will be denied a voice of reason to counter all of this non-sense.

Would it kill ESPN to hire a dapper Don Juan such as
the one pictured above?

Wow, really no east-west, north-south, just straight-up we think we are better than everyone else what an awesome job on naming your divisions.


Is it just me or does Nebraska look like a shark about to attack some helpless guppies?

Everything that is Southern is by virtue of its Southerness better. This is a point that we have covered before and shall continue to cover. I would like to now open up the discussion forum here at S&G and invite any and all Yankees as well as Carpetbaggers who now live in the South to answer this one question.

If you hate the South so much why did you fight a war to keep us?

To all our Yankee friends enjoy your cold weather, ugly women, bland food, and turrible college football.....as of right now we all really believe that Ohio State has a shot at the National Title.....no, really we believe you......we do, Ohio State is a National Powerhouse.