Da' Dream Makin' Cold Blooded Sausage


Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Tressel's Firing- What It Means to Dawg Nation

I do not enjoy taking a big ol' dump on someone when they are down unless of course that someone is Ohio State. Just a few random thoughts before I link this deal to Georgia.

- As bad as the media wanted Auburn.... in the end they had to pour gasoline on one of their baby doll programs and lite the match. Good thing ESPN will still have Boise State to talk about.
- When you paint yourself into a moral corner like the Big Twelvinie has done you have to chuckle at the demise of their elite program.
- Ohio State hired a hit man and then couldn't stand the site of the dead body. You wanted to be elite this is the price. Learn to manipulate the rules better.
- Has anyone at ESPN taken Herbie's belt and shoelaces yet?
- The Big Ten.....one day maybe you'll get more than the answers to the test right.

Moving on.

First let me say that the collapse of Ohio State benefits Iowa, Wisconsin, and Nebraska more than anyone. The inexplicable voodoo mind control that Tressel had over programs that are actually pretty good is over. Nebraska expected minimal resistance by Ohio State to their take over of Big Ten football and now none stand in their way.
As for the possible replacements for Tress:
1. Urban Meyer- 0.00% chance he takes this job. He chose Florida over Notre Dame (his dream job) in o6--why? Simple, he knows you can't win in yankeeland. He now has 2 National Titles--why blow all that good will at Ohio State. It will 3-5 years of sanctions, 3-5 years before they recover from sanctions, 3-5 more years to install the spread, all the while taking people further and further from the memory of his glory days at Florida. On the other hand he can wait 4 more years for Kelly to install a spread at Notre Dame, get fired, and swoop in at ND and save the day. ND will be so desperate they will agree to pay him out the butt and lower their academic standards.

2. Bo Pelini- 0.00% chance he takes the job. Why go to Ohio St- 3-5 years of sanctions--3-5 years to recover from sanctions- 3-5 years to get back to elite status. Bo can stay at Nebraska and dominate the Big Ten tomorrow not in 9 to 15 years.

The Fighting Chocolate Covered Peanut Butter Balls are not going to give some 19 year old assistance named Pickle the job. So in 2012 the hunt will be on for a straight edged, solid, trust-worthy, Christian man who can restore a sense of pride and honesty to a shattered program. A man with a track record of success in the past. A man who will run only the most vanilla of offenses. Might we make a suggestion......................................................................................

If we don't fire him y'all could always offer him about 5 million a year. Its really a bargain Ohio.

During his march to the sea General Sherman, an Ohio Native, said " I will make Georgia howl." He did just that. Committing more war crimes and atrocities than the U.S. army in Vietnam and George W. Bush's administration combined (if of course you consider keeping America safe a war crime). What sweet revenge it would be to pay back a debt we have owed Ohio for many years.


  1. Anon,

    Now, now, this could be a win/lose situation. We could actually get a new coach who might beat the gators more than 1 in five tries. the ohio state (POS) could get a coach who would choke against Michigan 4 times out of every 5 years.

  2. Little off subject here but do you think that the recent commits will be able to decommit from OSU

  3. William,
    do you mean new signees from February, or "recent commits"? Recent commits haven't signed anything and are free to go elsewhere. Signees are generally granted a release in these situations, sometimes with certain stipulations. If there are NCAA sanctions, then I think rising seniors can walk free too according to the rules.