Da' Dream Makin' Cold Blooded Sausage

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Monday, August 29, 2011

S&G Cold Blooded Pre-Season Top 10.


Cold-Bloooooooded
While the rest of the world pops out a top 25 roughly 45 minutes after the end of the National Title Game we at S&G operate on a different time table.  Why rank a team before you know all the details?  Anyone can can hurt, just ask Knile Davis.  Also, anyone can get caught pouring Crystal onto Brazilian hookers upon a ponzi-scheme/rap mogul's yacht, right Miami?  Also, 25 is too many. So you have seen all the rest now behold the best Top 10 in the land.......and as always it is realer than real, son!

1. Alabama Crimson Tide- They have it all-- a quasi-prison gang on defense, a big-strong-nasty O-line, roughly 15 wilda-beasts at running back lead by one alpha wilda-beast, decent receivers, and a QB who won't turn the ball over (at least he better not, or else!).
2. LSU Tigers-  Even with all of the problems they are still loaded.  Trust us when we tell you that losing a QB (in the loosest sense of the word) and a WR will not stop their Gee Chee Killing Machine of a Defense.
3. Wisconsin Badgers-  They once again have an NFL size and caliber O-line and about 15 Clydesdales in the backfield.  The Sweater Vest mind-control is gone and only Nebraska stands between them and a date in New Orleans.
4. Stanford Cardinal- Luck (the QB not the thing they had when they landed Harbaugh) will carry them on his back.  Unless Oregon finds some DTs in the next few weeks the Cardinal will take the PAC-12.
5. Florida State Seminoles- They are deceiving because they could run the table with a down Florida and an ACC that is full on retarded.  If they are undefeated then expect Bama or LSU to devour them in the title game.
6. Arkansas Razorbacks- If Knile Davis were not injured they would be at #4.  Slutty Bobby P' will still have tons of tools on offense.
7. Texas AnM Aggies- They are better than Chokelahomo and should roll out of the Big Texas Conference with a parting Championship shot.
8. Oregon Ducks-  They are better than everyone they play except LSU and Stanford.  Could be a short lived run at the top with Chip Kelly Ohio State bound.
9. Nebraska Cornhuskers- Wisconsin is better all around but the BIG N ain't too far from controlling the Big Ten.
10. TCU Hornie Toads- All you need to know is this, son

3 comments:

  1. No UGA???? tHIS IS RIDIKULOUS!!!!

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  2. The ACC.....
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svwGRJA28lY

    ReplyDelete
  3. Cuz UGA is warm and fuzzy, not cold blooded (well, maybe Grantham).

    ReplyDelete