Da' Dream Makin' Cold Blooded Sausage

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Thursday, December 29, 2011

Gus Malzahn- Insane, Jumping a Sinking Ship, or Just a Gentleman with Impeccable Timing?

While naturally talking SEC Football at the barber shop yesterday Gus Malzahn's name came up.  My barber said "Ol' Malzahn got out of town he must know the ship is about to go down."  I thought for a second and said "I'll believe they catch Auburn when they catch em'.  This ain't their first time at the rodeo."

Then I got to thinking and had an epiphany.......Malzahn isn't jumping ship he is just positioning himself for his dream job.  Here is the deal.  Penn State can't get anyone to take the HC gig up there for obvious reasons.  The PSU deal will shake out one of two ways:
1. They keep the interim guy through next season and hope some heat dies down before making a play for a big name, or
2. They will realize that child rape is not something that just goes away and will decide to just back the money truck up to some coaches house this season.

Either way they are going to have to target someone with the following resume:
- Success as a college HC
- A name big enough to make it look as if PSU is still an elite job
- A name that can justify the enormous salary they are going to have to dish out
- A man with no morals, and
- A slutty, slutty, nasty, money whore who is always open for business.
Now cross check that in your HC data base and tell who is the first name that pops up......

"Oh No.....Pig Sooooieeee is going to lose the one big pig!"   What will the most unrealistic fan base in the universe do?     Simple they will look right down the road a piece and guess who is right there ripe for the picking.........

Eyes...slightly crossed,
Offense....wide open,
Timing..... Impeccable. 
Well played Mr. Malzahn.....well played indeed.

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