Da' Dream Makin' Cold Blooded Sausage

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Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Les Miles to Arkansas and Other Hilarious Stories of Programs "Overestimating" Themselves

So here in Augusta we don't find ourselves exposed to very many Arkansas fans.  However, a few years ago myself and two of my friends took a trip to Memphis.  Among the three of us I am a Georgia fan, one of the others is an Alabama fan, and the other is a Clampsun fan.  My Bama friend knew some people in Memphis and we ended up going to dinner with about 15 people.  We got stuck at the end of the table with two seemingly normal guys.  As the conversation went on these two normal looking young men identified themselves as Arkansas fans.  At the time Houston Nutt was their Head Coach and one of us made the mistake of saying "Nutt is a pretty good coach."

These two clean cut, normal, seemingly sane young men immediately turned into the worst combination of a smug Alabama fan, unrealistic Clampsun fan, soul-less Georgia Tech fan, and Ignorant Tannercee fan.  These two morons told us that Arkansas is one of the two or three best jobs in the entire country.  They told us that there was absolutely NO REASON why Arkansas should not compete for a National Title every year.....every year....and they should win the National Title far more often than they don't win it.

While foaming at the mouth and clawing his own skin as if he had just smoked a bunch of meth one of them said "Name one reason why we shouldn't compete for a National Title every year".  With a harmony of agreement that you literally never see from a Georgia, Alabama, and Clampsun fan we all said "Because you are Arkansas!"  At various moments through out the entire night one of us would say "Do you think those guys were just joking?", or "Do all Arkansas fans think that way?", or "My God they were more delusional than any Auburn or Sakerlina fan I have ever encountered.", or "Name one reason?   Name one reason?  How about two reasons...Alabama and LSU."  To this day we still laugh about it.  This morning my Clampsun friend called me about the Miles to LSU story.  We decided that we must have been sitting with the University President and AD of Arkansas that night because how in the world does Arkansas think that Les Miles would leave LSU for them.  That would be like McDonalds calling and offering a minimum wage job to the Head Chef at a five star restaurant.  Les Miles turned down his Alma Mater to stay at LSU..........but Arkansas thinks that coaches everywhere lay their heads down at night dreaming of getting that call from Fayetville.  Good call Arkansas I'm sure you won't get embarrassed by this.  Oh, and remember a few years ago when you were looking to replace Nutt mid-season and all the rumors were swirling about your interest in Clampsun's Tummie Bowden.........well I hear he may be available.

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